Here Comes the Reign Again
By Erica Tywater As a little girl I read books about fairy princesses who could twirl around and their problems would disappear. They wore beautiful dresses and upon their heads was a magical tiara that was the envy of everyone in the kingdom. I used to imagine that I was one of these princesses and that by twirling around all of my problems would disappear in an instant. As I got older my imagination sadly began to fade and I entered the world of punch clocks, diapers, and ever rising gas prices. I no longer had time to think about "nonsense" but rather had to think about the important things in life like getting that promotion at work or feeding the kids. Stress became a daily occurrence in my life and I was so wrapped up in it that I couldn't see straight. One Saturday as I was sitting on the couch watching something mind altering like the latest infomercial on how to make your buns firm in only 48 hours,my depression began to rage. "You aren't good enough, smart enough, and you certainly don't have buns like those on T.V. Who are you anyway? What happened to the princess you used to be?" You've got to love that healthy self talk huh? But I had a point there. What had happened to the princess I used to be? This thought gave me an idea so I ran to my closet and found an old box of dolls that I had packed away long ago. With breathless anticipation I opened the box and found what I was looking for..a tiara that I had gotten long ago as a birthday present. I placed the tiara upon my head and ran to look at myself in the mirror. There I stood in my ragged t-shirt and faded terry cloth shorts and saw the crown sitting upon my head. True, my hair was tangled and I did not have one ounce of make up on my face, but for some reason I suddenly felt better. I truly felt like a princess. Gone were the things I normally looked for like the lines forming around my eyes and the stains of spaghetti sauce on my shirt. I saw her...the girl that I had remembered. For this brief moment I was able to let the stress go. I laughed at the image of myself and realized how silly it was that I had placed such value on things that didn't matter. How funny that something as silly and simple as an old store bought tiara could make me feel better. I wore that crown for 2 days and have made it a point to wear it when I get stressed. The lesson that I learned from all of this is that I am a beautiful Princess, inside and out, and sometimes I need to be reminded of that. The TV won't remind me of this, my boss at work won't tell me this, and even my family who loves me dearly forgets how lucky they are to have royalty living among them. It's up to me to remember who I am and what I have to offer. Who am I? I am Erica, Princess of my apartment, Mother of Ayden and Cosette, loving wife of Chris, a woman who makes mistakes and isn't afraid to admit it. True, I have my days where the self talk starts creeping it's way back into my head but I make it a point to realize that the fairy kingdom that I rule is one of love, kindness, and self discovery. I alone have the power to choose what kind of kingdom I rule. Today I choose to rule with humility, creativity, hope, and family. Who knows what tomorrow will bring.
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